Follow by Email

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Zombie Apocalypse Time

Zombie apocalypse time
Its that time of the month. You wake up and your girlfriend wants to eat you...but this time shes a zombie. So what do you do?

Distract her with your morning breathe. This gives you approximately 2.3 seconds to run out the door and shut it. She'll be in there for a few minutes rethinking her relationship with you.

Guess what now. Your roomate sees you(hes a zombie) he quickly finishes his bowl of honeynut chex(no, I wasn't paid) takes it to the kitchen, washes it(you thought he'd change now?)and saunters toward you. Behind you is the bathroom. Temporary solution I know. But maybe theres weapons.

So whats in there? Toilet shower and sink. Forgetting something...oh yeah you quickly pull out your oral b toothbrush and crest complete toothpaste( I wasn't paid). Gotta make sure the breathe is minty fresh in case you have to save a hot chick.

Back to the matter at hand. Need weapons and need to get out of here some how. The zombies in the house are banging on the door. You decide to take the plunger and the floss(its about time its been put to use). You look out the bathroom window and a smell wafts up and slaps you in the face. The apartment dumpster is right below the window two floors down(a fact your girlfriend has complained about on numerous occasions)

An arm busts through the door. Sh!t. Gotta jump.

To be continued...

No comments:

Post a Comment